I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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