Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
My liver just broke up with me...
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you traded sex for a burrito?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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