You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
