no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
