So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
how do you play pong handcuffed?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
