sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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