is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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