adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Someone signed my nipple.
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