I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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