Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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