I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
