Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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