I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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