sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
