I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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