I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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