Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
