I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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