Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize