I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
