I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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