the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
