Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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