I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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