Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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