Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize