We named our party play list daddy issues
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
