I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
