I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize