I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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