What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
