there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
