Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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