The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
