I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
