pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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