just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
