the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
