Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
