my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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