Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
