I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Pooping to opera.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
