So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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