I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
ttyl tear gas
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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