if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
