only if we run a train.
done.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
