Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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