she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize