I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
