In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
